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The First Date Bill of Rights - LoveEngineer.com4 years, 9 months ago
The First Date Bill of Rights
Ladies: When you go on a first date, it’s a good idea to have some standards and guidelines that will help you know, quickly and efficiently, if he’s worth a second look. Don’t waste time dating Mr. Wrong!
If he falls far short in any or several of these categories (one or two small deficiencies may be excusable), starting a relationship with him may not be a good idea. Don’t despair if he does–you’re now free to look for other, better prospects.
If all goes well, this first date may lead to another, then another, and you’re off on the Road to a Relationship. But don’t speed down this road in a souped-up convertible with the top down, no matter how much fun it seems to be! Keep your eyes open and your judgment intact.
As a single woman, you are entitled to expect the following traits from your first date.
· Reliable: Did he call you when he stated he would?
· Accessible: Did he provide you with his cell phone number and email address, in case you need to reach him about an unexpected change in plans?
· Approachable: Did he welcome you to contact him at any time?
· Conscientious: Is the planned activity both convenient and enjoyable?
· Accommodating: Did he suggest and book a suitable place to meet?
· Thorough: Were you impressed with the arrangements that were made?
· Polite: Did he show good manners?
· Connectable: Was it easy to talk, or did making conversation feel like “pulling teeth”?
· Attentive: Did he listen to what you told him or hinted about your personal preferences?
· Generous: Did he reserve a table at a restaurant suitable for intimate dialogue, and did he tip appropriately?
· Comfort: Did you leave with the feeling that you would really enjoy spending time together in the future?
· Chemistry: Are you physically attracted to your date?
· Integrity: Did he seem honest?
· Safety: Did you feel secure throughout the evening?
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Resource : www.ditchingmrwrong.com
Nicholas Aretakis is author of Ditchin’ Mr. Wrong: How to End a Bad Nicholas Aretakis is a life coach and writer tackling challenging subjects. He is the author of Ditching Mr. Wrong: How to End a Bad Relationship and Find Mr. Right. He splits his time between Saratoga Springs, New York, and Scottsdale, Arizona. Mr. Aretakis interviewed hundreds of women, committed to helping women become more dating savvy.
www.ditchingmrwrong.com- Read The Original Article Here
Top 10 Mistakes Single Women Make - Graduates.com4 years, 10 months ago
It sucks to be single sometimes, and basically because most of us girls are absolutely CLUELESS about men. Author Nicholas Aretakis was kind enough to help me out with his list of the top 10 mistake us single girls make.
1) Dating a guy for superficial reasons..such as looks, money, or prestige.
2) Failing to do a background check on your...hot prospect.?
3) Committing to a guy too early, before you really get to know him.
4) Not treating the quest to find a lifelong partner and potential father for your children as a serious, priority pursuit.
5) Putting all your focus on the relationship, while ignoring your own social network and support group.
6) Removing yourself from,the field, too quickly in a relationship, thus cutting off exposure to better prospects.
7) Staying in a bad relationship far too long, ignoring the early warning signs.
8) Compromising career and personal goals to accommodate your man.
9) Trying to change him, or believing you can.
10) Hitting the baby panic, (or the lonely panic) button and settling for less than you deserve.- Read The Original Article Here
Rachel - Austin, TX5 years, 8 months ago
Nicholas Aretakis is an entrepreneur, a high-tech veteran, and the author of Ditching Mr. Wrong: How to End a Bad Relationship and Find Mr. Right (Next Stage Press, 2008). He was a jet-setting bachelor until the age of 42, when he met and married Ms. Right. After he settled down, one question about the dating scene he’d left behind nagged at him: Why do so many great gals settle for men who aren’t right for them?
So he began talking to women and thinking about his observations of men he knew from his social circle, business contacts, college days, and time on the singles circuit. Their stories became the foundation for Ditching Mr. Wrong, a book he dedicates to “the millions of women each year searching for Mr. Right.”
Aretakis, 46, received advanced degrees in mathematics at Hobart and William Smith College and electrical engineering at Columbia University. He started his career in sales and marketing in the high-tech industry, and then moved on to become a senior executive at ESS Technology, Inc., and GlobeSpan, Inc. He became a Silicon Valley millionaire by age 30. His analytical skills, ambition, and managerial savvy came in handy for writing Ditching Mr. Wrong. Aretakis firmly believes that “most problems, when viewed objectively, have effective solutions.”
Aretakis is author of the top-selling book No More Ramen: The 20-Something’s Real World Survival Guide (www.NoMoreRamenOnline.com). He has a familyrun business that offers humane solutions for walking your dog (www.ezleash.com). He is also a member of the ASU Technology Investor Forum, providing access to angel funding and mentorship to fledgling companies in Arizona.
Aretakis continues to share his insights on dating and relationships at www. DitchingMrWrong.com, an interactive website community geared toward women searching for Mr. Right.
A seasoned media pro, Aretakis has appeared on ABC, FOX, and Comcast News; been interviewed by the Associated Press, Wall Street Journal, Washington Post, New York Post, Los Angeles Times, Boston Globe, and Arizona Republic; and has been featured in Fortune Magazine, CNN Money, MSN, MSNBC, and at Yahoo, AOL, CareerBuilder. com, and Monster, among others.
Aretakis and his wife, Ginger, live in Scottsdale, Arizona, and Saratoga Springs, New York, with their two young daughters, Ella and Sophia, and two feisty Jack Russell terriers.
Hobart & William Smith Colleges - New York5 years, 9 months ago
Finding Mr. Right, "Ditching Mr. Wrong"
Alum Nicholas Aretakis '83 knows a few things about dating - he was a bachelor until 42, when he married his Mrs. Right. In his new novel, "Ditching Mr. Wrong," he shares some insight on dating, relationships, and finding an ideal partner.
After he married, Aretakis wondered why so many women settle for men who aren't right for them; he began to talk to women and reflect on his own experiences as a single man. With these anecdotes, along with advice and exercises, "Ditching Mr. Wrong" provides women with tools for finding an ideal man and building a healthy, quality relationship.
The handbook includes a "Dating Litmus Test," a comprehensive checklist with which women can analyze whether or not a guy has the potential to be a long-term mate. The guide also includes profiles of the 20 worst types of men to get involved with, and tools on how to increase a woman's "Mr. Wrong-savvy."
In a book that Aretakis dedicates to "the millions of women each year searching for Mr. Right," he also looks at the mistakes women frequently make in relationships, how to end a bad relationship, and advice on getting back into the dating field.
Aretakis was a mathematics major at Hobart, before receiving an electrical engineering degree at Columbia University. He began working in sales and marketing in the high-tech industry, eventually becoming a senior executive. Aretakis has a family-run business that offers humane solutions for walking your dog, and is also the author of "No More Ramen: The 20-Something's Real World Survival Guide: Straight Talk on Jobs, Money, Balance, Life, and More."- Read The Original Article Here
RebeccasReads - www.rebeccareads.com5 years, 9 months ago
There are two things that stood out right away when I first picked up “Ditching Mr. Wrong;” the first being that the author, Nicholas Aretakis, is male, and the second being that he holds two degrees: one in mathematics and the other in electrical engineering. I found this to be quite a non-typical background for an author who wrote a book aiding women in ending dead-end relationships. Perhaps Aretakis’s gender and previous training allow him to provide a fresh perspective on the topic.
“Ditching Mr. Wrong” begins by stating that women are on a timetable to find a man, especially if they want to have children. It takes years to find a suitable mate and to establish a healthy relationship. The more time that one wastes on men that aren’t worth it, the less time there is to find the right man. Aretakis provides the reader with a number of different checklists and quizzes in order to help you determine whether or not the man you are dating is a keeper. One example from Part One is where he lists what he calls “The First Date Bill of Rights.” He provides certain questions for you to ponder as to whether your date lives up to certain attributes. For example, to gauge politeness you should ask yourself, “Did he show good manners?” and to judge how accommodating he is, you are to answer the question, “Did he suggest and book a suitable place to meet?” (p. 26)
The bulk of the book provides profiles of twenty different male personalities and then provides advice as to whether or not you should pursue a relationship with each individual type. I found this section to be very interesting and feel that it contains a lot of useful information. I believe that I can accurately place someone that I know into each and every one of the twenty categories.
I really believe that “Ditching Mr. Wrong” would be a beneficial read to anyone who is having difficulty in finding “Mr. Right.” Aretakis’s book is fun to read, and the advice given is sound. The information is presented in a clear, straightforward manner, and I think that all single women out there will find very helpful in aiding their relationship decisions.
Reviewed by Kam Aures for RebeccasReads (3/09)
Sarah Delight - Providence, Rhode Island5 years, 10 months ago
I read Ditching Mr. Wrong during my holiday travels. I read the whole book between take-off, changing planes, and landing. It was particularly relevant to me as a single woman with more failed relationships than I like to admit.
The book would be great for young women if they would stop wasting their newfound freedom and realize their future is determined by steps they take daily. Those of us who have been around the block a time or two need to learn the error of our ways by reading this book.
A friend recommended the book to me and I let it sit. Had I read it when I received it, I would have spared myself a relationship (a two dater) that never should have had one date.
The profiles of Mr. Wrong show a lady with a long-term relationship goal the pitfalls that can rob us of our child bearing years. This is a must read.
My low rating for coffee table, bedside, and permanent library are because when I follow this advice, I won't need the book permanently. Using these strategies, I'll be sitting with Mr. Right at the couch next to the coffee table. We definitely won't need it bedside:).
Thanks to Nichols Aretakis. He is a man that knows what women go through. He also took the time to teach and hopefully spare us from wasting any more time barking up the wrong tree.
I was inspired to go for what I want and not waste time compromising for less.
Chris - Toga-moving forward5 years, 11 months ago
I really wish I had read this book before I got married! I have been divorced since 2001 and he is the "mama's boy". Now he thinks he is a "playboy". Other than the fact that I had 3 great kids with him the marriage was a complete waste of my time. I am currently in a relationship and this book has me questioning this person also! As I was reading the book I found that I was asking myself "why am I settling". I am successful and independent and attractive!
Deanna J. - Menlo Park, CA5 years, 11 months ago
This book should be every single woman's primer for identifying whether or not the man you are dating has potential or is wasting your time.
Mr. Aretakis has very thoroughly covered a myriad of male profiles from Mr. Non-Committal to The Mama's Boy. This easy-to-read entertaining book is extrememely insightful and enormously helpful. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is in the beginning or middle of a relationship. Makes a great gift for that friend who is "always the bridesmaid".
Elisabeth Hunt - Unknown5 years, 11 months ago
This is a great book, honest and to the point. I am married but decided to read this book because I have a friend who is constantly dating Mr. Wrong's!! I convinced her to read this book and she finally gets it! It is great to have a man's point of view and I am happy to say, my girlfriend is taking her time and not dating men just to date them and is now is in search of Mr. Right!!!
J. Rogers - Scottsdale, AZ5 years, 11 months ago
A MUST READ for all single women out there!
Wow, what can I say???...this book definitely opened my eyes to everything I've been doing wrong in my journey to find a great man. The 20 profiles of Mr. Wrong were right on target. So much so, that I must say, I think I've dated all 20 types!!! Thanks for the perspective, Mr. Aretakis.
Jennifer - ASU - A life-long lesson for any and ALL women!5 years, 11 months ago
Ditching Mr. Wrong is an exceptional and brilliant book! I definitely loved the 20 profiles of Mr. Wrong! I identified some of these profiles with past relationships; fortunately, my current boyfriend passed!
The Dating Litmus Test was also a plus considering my boyfriend passed, but previous guys in my life would have failed miserably. Any women out their currently seeking some fantastic relationship advice, or are stuck in a bad relationship, this book is most definitely for you! I recommend this book to any and all women out there! Whether in a relationship, or taking on the hardship of a broken relationship, this book will help soothe your mind and help you come out with a positive outlook on eventually finding Mr. Right!
This book could even be a great starter for women as a guideline to not attract any men within the 20 profiles of Mr. Wrong. Thanks Nicholas for making me realize that finding Mr. Right is without doubt one of the most important decisions in a women's life!
Michelle - North Carolina5 years, 11 months ago
As a 21-year-old in college, I can't tell you how many of my friends end up in heart-breaking relationships. "Ditching Mr. Wrong" is the perfect book to not only realize when you need get out of those horrible situations, but also how to spot the wrong guy.
Nicholas Aretakis speaks from an experienced point of view, while remaining personable to the reader. There are accounts of other women's experiences that the reader can relate to. As the book is from a male perspective, Aretakis is able to offer insight into why men act the way they do. So many of my girlfriends over analyze their relationships to the extent that they can't focus on anything else. In turn, "Ditching Mr. Wrong" provides lists, such as "Top 20 Deal Breakers" to help simplify our over articulated explanations.
For any woman who has ever been stuck in a relationship that you can't make your mind up about--this book is for you! "Ditching Mr. Wrong" makes women realize their potential and that there is always a better man out there!
Michelle Bell - Boston5 years, 11 months ago
I'm a happily married women in my early 40's. This book was a great read for coaching my daughter in what qualities I would want her to have in a partner or just a friend. No relationship is perfect and Mr. Aretakis does a great job in helping one sort out what things a couple need to work on to have a successful marriage.
Hillary - Scottsdale5 years, 11 months ago
This book is a guide to finding the companion you deserve. The author classifies all the Mr. Wrongs into 20 profiles. Unfortunately, I was able to throw a couple guys from my past into each category.
The author nails each profile – it’s eerie how many similarities you will find between the profiles and your boyfriends (hopefully ex’s). It is easy to see the warning signs when looking back on a relationship, but this book helps you to recognize the red flags or any current or future relationship. This book is a must-read for EVERY woman – whether you are single, in a relationship, or married. I only wish I had this book years ago.
Debbie - Boston6 years ago
I loved this book, and the beginning was captivating; it was like looking in the mirror or reading about my own life and experiences. As I read on, I found the book both empowering and liberating. I had to laugh out loud when I hit a few of the profiles, there were at least 6 that I could count that described my ex-husband and a few former boyfriends.
The Man in Control was dead on with my ex, who tried to control my life, limit my career and discourage my own social network. The Mama's Boy was eerily similar to a guy I dated for a few months, who had to get reassurance from his mom on everything from where to go have dinner or how to dress. The Mooch describes perfectly the last guy that I dumped, wouldn't pay for a thing, and conveniently forgot his wallet- I don't mind paying my way, but I didn't think it was appropriate for me to pay all the time.
Christine Woods - New York6 years ago
A must read for ALL single women!, November 25, 2008
Thank you Mr. Aretakis for giving me the tools to recognize that my old relationship was COMPLETELY not working for me. You hit me over the head, and I needed that! The really good news is that after breaking up with my boyfriend, I went out on many "first dates" (at least 10) but learned from your book that there was no good reason for a second one with ANY of them.
I did finally meet a guy that I have been with for several months now and he DID pass the Dating (Litmus) Test! If you are seriously looking for Mr. Right, read this book and pass it along to your single friends. Take the quiz and answer HONESTLY. It works!
M. Leslie - Albany6 years ago
The book is based on interviews with singles, so it is interesting and fun to read. The Hot Prospect Background Check is a quick guide for deciding if a new man is worth pursuing. The Dating Test will allow you to score your relationship and decide if it is time to move on. If it is best to cut loose, the book will help you empower yourself to end a relationship that is going nowhere. By the way, the solutions are dignified. When you are ready, the book offers tips on getting back into the dating game.
Areviewer - Midwest6 years ago
If you are looking for Mr. Right and keep running into Mr. Wrong, get this book!! It will help you to get rid of that dirtbag and get onto the better guys who will treat you better! Sure, we all get stuck in a rutt from time to time and this book tells you how to get out. I will recommend it to friends.
Gail in NY - New York6 years ago
Ladies, listen up: There's a great book for single gals. Check out Ditching Mr. Wrong, by Nicholas Aretakis. I recently had to read a stack of dating books for a writing project, so I've had a chance to compare every relevant title out there.
In Ditching Mr. Wrong, Aretakis betrays the "secret handshake" between guys and lets gals know what tricks and traps to avoid when single men are on the prowl. If I had a 20-something daughter, I'd buy Ditching for her. Ditching shows women how to quickly vet a Mr. Wrong so she doesn't waste her time. It's also chockfull of fun tips, quizzes, and checklists. It's a high self-esteem book and exceptionally practical--much more so, in my opinion, than He's Just Not That Into You.
Kristi Gustafson - On the Edge6 years ago
"Ditching Mr. Wrong: How to End a Bad Relationship and Find Mr. RightRight”, is a new book by Saratoga Springs-based author, Nicholas Aretakis. This book is a dating guide with one message: The sooner you get Mr. Wrong out of your life, the sooner you’ll find Mr. Right. Aretakis unveils the workings ...- Read The Original Article Here